Definition of an Orchid Addict

... you convert your babie's crib into a light cart.

... you make plans for your orchids to travel, on vacation with you, 1,300 miles, rather than leave them with DH and risk his first year orchid care.

... you are thoroughly examining some gorgeous orchids in a store trying to find the best looking one and people mistake you for working there and start asking questions!

... you consider selling off the furniture (antique heirlooms from your Grandmother) in the guestroom, so that you can turn it into an orchid room!

... you dream about buying orchids.

... you drive about 120 miles one way with a topographic map of the National Forest looking at the lay of the land to see where native orchids Might be, hoping they are in bloom.

... you drive 104 miles one way to attend the meeting of the only local Orchid Society, just to be near similarly obsession infected people. Then drive home in the middle of the night and go to work the next day.

... you start planning the next greenhouse just after you get thru building the current greenhouse.

... you apologize profusely, out loud, to the orchids when you do anything that is not optimum to them.

... looking through new orchid catalogues is less thrilling than it used to be because you already have most of them.

... you have to run to the greenhouse to use: Listerine, rubbing alcohol, cinnamon.

... you never BBQ kebabs because the bamboo skewers are all being used as stakes for your orchids.

... you turn into the local nursery.

... any time you go shopping and the store has orchids, you start the sentance: "I'm just going ..." and your family finishes it: "...to check out the orchids."

.... you stand for 2 hours in a heavy rainstorm holding an umbrella over your mounted phalie so it doesn't get crown rot.

... your spouse asks for a divorce and all you say is: "the orchids stay with me."

... the first thing you look at in HD or Lowe's is to see if they have any neat tagged orchids, and if they do you buy one instead of the new tool you were going to get.

... the only thing you want for Christmas is orchids and there are no nurseries and it is freezing outside.

... you think about returning the jewelry you got and waiting till spring to use the $$ to buy orchids.

... at the start of your addiction, you buy your plant and pet sitter a few orchids, so that she gets interested in them, thereby making her less likely to demolish the ones you have.

... you are giving all your friends and family members orchids for birthdays, anniversaries, Christmas..., knowing that orchids will end up with you eventually  because people will beg you to take them back after flowering, not having clue what to do with them.

... you are young and decide it is time to have orchids as kids.

... you go to bed thinking about them and wake up still thinking about them.

... you would drive through three or four towns on your 3 hour trip to find one orchid.

... vacations out of town are centered around visits to new orchid growers you haven't visted yet.

... you don't want to go on vacation when your favorites are about to bloom.

... you'd rather stay home with your orchids, instead of going to England (or anywhere else!) on vacation.

...you go on vacation and warn the neighbor watching your house that if he does not water the greenhouse he will end up missing body parts when you get back.

... you get back from vacation and spend the first few hours home combing through the greenhouse looking for spikes.

... you use one of your bathrooms as a potting shed, and it's the one you make your guest use.

... you put together a wedding gift of 3 Laelia purpuratas in bloom in one pot, knowing darn well they wont be able to take care of them. (I got themback about 3 months later.)

... you won't go NEAR the roach you found hanging out in the bathroom in the morning (and make your roomie kill it!) but would consider beating it with its own legs if you found one of his buddies anywhere near your orchids

... you'd rather endure a cold Canadian winter with your orchids than go south for that time.

... planning on moving to Fl. so I can, lol, well you know what.

... the people at the local nursery know your first name.

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